Do you have colitis, cancer, or a constant cold? The key to coping with a chronic is saying “yes” to your disease — even if it’s breast cancer. Here’s inspiration from Natalie Goldberg — because I admire her success as a best-selling author and think her perspective is perfect for See Jane Soar (and coping with illness)!
“Our task is to say a holy yes to the real things of our life as they exist,” said Natalie Goldberg.
Saying yes means accepting both the bitter and the sweet parts of life — the diseases like breast cancer or ulcerative colitis, and the joys like love and melted dark chocolate. If you’re coping with a chronic illness (like me!) and need more info, click You Don’t Look Sick: Living Well With Invisible Chronic Illness. And, read on for ways to cope with a chronic illness, inspired by Natalie Goldberg…
Coping With Chronic Illness – Natalie Goldberg
I’ve struggled with ulcerative colitis for over 10 years – and no matter how many probiotics I take or what foods I avoid, it still flares regularly. But I’ve learned that it’s not how I treat my condition that matters as much as how I treat myself. With ulcerative colitis – or any chronic illness – perspective and lifestyle often packs more punch than the illness itself.
To cope with a chronic illness, look at your lifestyle. Overstress contributes to most major health problems, including heart disease, high blood pressure, arthritis, respiratory problems, cancer, gastrointestinal disorders such as ulcerative colitis, and even breast cancer. The three main stresses in life – the whimsies of daily living, your personality, and your physical self – all directly affect your health.
1. Everyday stressors. The daily grind is stressful: traffic, accidents, grumpy people. Frustrations are numerous and generous, and stress – from misplacing your keys to planning a summer vacation — can make health conditions worse.
2. Your personality. How do you handle the frustrations in your day? Are you irritable or pleasant? optimistic or pessimistic? You’ve learned specific ways of coping, and they should improve your life and mood and how you deal with the symptoms of ulcerative colitis or another chronic illness…but do they?
3. Your physical body. Your physiological makeup determines how stress affects your health. Tension headaches, insomnia, ulcers – the responses to stress are varied. Stress aggravates your weakest link; for instance, my weakness is my guts, so my colitis is more likely to flare when I’m anxious about visiting my in-laws.
5 Ways to Cope With Chronic Illness
1. Take control of your disease. Tackling your health issues is empowering and encouraging. When you face a diagnosis of ulcerative colitis or another chronic illness, do your research, attend seminars, and talk to friends and professionals. Learn how your body and personality affects your health; practise different ways of managing your response to stress.
2. Re-evaluate your habits. Perhaps you unload the dishwasher at the office every day; you hate doing it but feel you should. At home, you grind your teeth when you walk the dog – twice a day for a decade now – because if you don’t, who will? It’s time to re-evaluate your responsibilities. Who set these expectations and why are you meeting them? Re-evaluate your habits regularly.
3. Remember the mind-body connection. If your blood boils when you’re stuck in traffic, practise expressing anger appropriately instead of swallowing it. Learn how to release negative feelings – even if it makes you or others uncomfortable. It’s healthier in the long run, especially if you’re coping with a chronic illness.
4. Relax. Decreased blood lactate blocks the stress mechanism that causes many physical ailments. You already know what relaxes you: reading, sailing, gardening, playing chess? When you’re coping with ulcerative colitis, depression, or breast cancer, consider trying new ways to relax. Get a massage or join a friend in their favourite activity – but don’t stress about it! And — make sure you get enough sleep.
5. Breathe deeply. Exercise is all it’s cracked up to be. It lowers cholesterol, prevents heart disease, improves blood circulation, and reduces your risk for cancer, diabetes, hypertension, and gastrointestinal disorders. It improves your sex life and makes you feel and look good – and it’s a great way to socialize! When you’re coping with chronic illness, try combining exercise and relaxation with yoga, swimming, walking, or hiking. For something really different, you could even consider praying with your doctor for healing.
Do you have any thoughts on coping with a chronic illness? I welcome your comments below…
This post is adapted from my original article called The Upside of Ulcerative Colitis, from the June 2007 issue of alive magazine.
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A very interesting article .. I laugh at the fact that I took a deep breath when you said ‘breathe’ … its a good reminder to just stop for a moment and the act of taking the breath in a focused way is quite relaxing…. like a mini, mini meditation! Taking lots of those in a day can do a lot to reduce stress and help in coping with a chronic illness. Thankyou
Lafwell @ chronic illness and laughter´s last blog post..Chronic Illness Management, Active Participation
You’re welcome, Lafwell. It’s amazing, because I actually took a deep breath when I wrote that sentence! Breathing good, fresh, clean air really does help with coping with a chronic illness because it oxgenates your brain and body.
Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen´s last blog post..What To Do When Your Mother in Law Doesn’t Like or Accept You
I find your article to be very effective. I have rheumatoid arthritis, and being very optomistic and not allowing this condition to rule myu life has helped enourmously. I know what my stressors are and have developed ways of relaxing. I find singing in a choir to be a brilliant way of destressing and I believe that singing reduces the amount of cortosol produced by the body. anyway it works for me.
Jean,
Thanks for taking the time to comment — and I love that you sing in a choir! I know a couple of people who do that, and they say the same thing: singing reduces stress and makes them feel happier and lighter. I think there’s something physical that happens when you sing loud and free, that just makes you feel wonderful.
Coping with any chronic illness is easier when we do things we love and keep an optimistic attitude
Blessings,
Laurie
Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen´s last blog post..Help for Remarriages – 6 Tips for Coping With Angry Ex-Wives
Is depression considered a chronic illness? I think so. I’ve been depressed for 15 years, but it’s been under control for most of the time. I think I’d rather have ulcerative colitis though.
Hi Shelly,
Fifteen years is a long time to be depressed! I’m it’s been under control for most of that time, though…and I think it could be considered a chronic illness in one sense. Although, most chronic illnesses do not go away, and depression can be cured, so…maybe it’s not medically considered a chronic illness! Though, some women struggle to cope with depression all their lives…
At any rate, I’m glad your depression is under control.
Blessings,
Laurie
Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen´s last blog post..How to Make Conversation for Introverts – Tips for Small Talk
actually, severe depression IS a chronic illness. the blues is one thing, clinical depression is another. it is a huge misconception that depression “can be cured.” depression can be managed and treated successfully in a variety of ways. but there is no “cure.”