The life lesson: sometimes your body doesn’t cooperate – or it even betrays you. The successful woman: Sarah Jessica Parker, who not only accepts her infertility…she talks about it.
“It would have been odd to have made this choice if I was able to have had successful pregnancies since my son’s birth,” said Parker in an Access Hollywood interview.
She’s talking about the twins she and husband Matthew Broderick are expecting by a surrogate mother. They have a six-year-old son together, want more children, and chose surrogacy as a final option. To delve further into authenticity and self-acceptance, click on The Courage to be Yourself: A Woman’s Guide to Emotional Strength and Self-Esteem by Sue Patton Thoele.
Accepting Your Infertility – Sarah Jessica Parker
I love that Sarah Jessica Parker is open to talking about not being able to get pregnant! I don’t know if being a star makes it more or less difficult to accept and talk about infertility (her fans will love her no matter what) – but I think she’s normalizing the fact that there are other ways to have children.
Parker is also defending her surrogate mother: “The most unsavory things have been done. She’s had her phone hacked, her personal computer information hacked; she’s had threats against her and true harassment.” Parker also says that the surrogate’s friends and family have been targeted.
All Parker wants is for her surrogate mother to stay healthy, and her twin girls to be born without stress and anxiety. But we hunger and thirst for every detail — which is the price famous women pay.
I’m not a fan of the whole “Sex and the City” part of who Sarah Jessica Parker is – but I love her honesty and willingness to share who she is. I think there’s a huge life lesson here.
Accept your body the way it is. A woman coping with infertility once told me, “I hate my broken ovaries.” I don’t think I’ll ever forget that, because it’s so unhealthy to reject – hate – part of your own body! It creates emotional barriers and physical animosity within yourself. Hating even a fingernail decreases your self-confidence and self-esteem.
My major health problem is ulcerative colitis, but I can’t bring myself to hate my own guts! They’re flared right now – after almost 10 months of happy remission – but I refuse to hate them. Hate makes things worse.
To accept and honor who you are as a woman – like Sarah Jessica Parker accepts her infertility – you need to talk about your “weaknesses” in a nonjudgmental way. My friend who hates her broken ovaries has to practice accepting her female parts just the way they are. “My broken ovaries are part of me. I accept them – because I can’t reject a piece of who I am.”
Do you think Sarah Jessica Parker is a successful woman? I’m also curious what you think of my not liking her TV show, yet holding her up as an example of how to See Jane Soar. Can I dislike her job (and how that affects how women see themselves), but like what she’s doing in her personal life?
If you’re coping with infertility, visit my Quips and Tips for Couples Coping With Infertility blog. You’re not alone, my friend!
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